On technology

When I was in high school I took this typing class that kept changing its title. Every year, for the three years that I took typing for the easy grades to keep up with contemporary developments in IT the class title would update. This sort of happened throughout the school, so Woodwork became Hard Materials Technology - which seemed really counter intuitive as even though predominately we worked with wood in Woodwork, we did sometimes use more materials than just wood but never enough to justify the name change. I am pretty sure if I had continued with Woodwork I would have actually got to work metal or something like that. All I really remember, and it is a painfully vivid memory, is Timothy running through the classroom, bloodied hand clasped in blood splattered other hand screaming the teachers name after he worked his hand into a woodworking machine.1 We wore white short sleeved shirts with unfortunate lack of top button so they were permanently open and ugly, fanning out. Across Timothy's shirt was blood from his bloodied hand, it was also on his shorts and on the ground of the classroom. When a hand is caught in a sanding machine, an upright commercial sanding machine that probably shouldn't have been operated by thirteen year old children, it inevitably comes out worse off. He didn't lose his hand or anything, but it was real scraped up. Really confused as to why the course was offered, ultimately the Hard Materials classes would make cabinets and chairs and everything but at what cost?
Anyway, in that same year, I really mastered touch typing as much as I ever would. This never extended to typing numbers. I still am really ham fisted. This is the constant issue of my life at work.

Most modern keyboards, and by modern keyboards I am ultimately referring to laptop computers are limited in their scope and miss out the horizontal sweep of a desktop computer. Also the desktop computer can sometimes have those bleak ergonomic keyboards. The worst type of keyboard. I feel I should limit this blog to solely talking about really really really really dull topics, like keyboard design. I feel this will really expand my market. Just want to make it big in the tech market. Talk about the new Samsung Ipad or something. Anyway, as I lack the full keyboard I am now doomed when typing in big numbers which comprises like 50% of my job. I spend half my day trying to use the bankers keyboard thing. Where you rest your finger on the zero. Its so upsetting. Sometimes I dream long tortured dreams about that little number pad. And they haunt me all day.


Got up in the morning two days ago and said to my girlfriend who was all sick and bleary and angry in bed as the morning sun came in like holy peals of angel choirs, like swimming in golden rivers of God's infinite grace and love, and I was all like "In the kingdom of the blind the deaf man is king" it didn't really make sense, but I said it with such conviction you know. It was like it really meant something. Apparently the expression is the one eyed man is king, but I sort of prefer my own take. Can't really remember the context. And I think context is everything.


1 This is really a lie. In that year alone I was bench mates with Sarah, who played GD for the school Netball team and also played Rugby for the first XV which was a degree of progressivism from the school which noone was expecting. I had a painful and awkward adolescent crush on her, as she wasn't the ideal of beauty for anyone which was sort of a progressive move from me I guess and she was also like maybe the tallest girl in the year group. She also made a considerably better electronic game, which basically worked like the board game Operation, than me. Mine didn't work, but hers buzzed and lit up which led to some bitter rivalry. She started dating this guy Caleb at another table who was about my height, which really hurt my pride. He is married now, so it doesn't really matter and at the time we all sort of laughed at him for dating a girl like a foot taller than him or something. But my laughter was a more conflicted laughter. I continued for the rest of the year to make really abysmal wooden objects.